The Twinkle Series

Written By: Saanvi Shah, FCSN Voices Youth Reporter
Graphics By: Casey Feng, FCSN Voices Graphic Artist

As the world becomes increasingly aware of the needs and talents within the special needs community, stories like that of Bob Gao offer a refreshing perspective. Bob, now 38 years old, was diagnosed with autism at the age of three. Today, he is a percussionist and is also proficient in playing the piano, marimba, and drums, as well as a member of a band that performs at various events. Despite the challenges he faced growing up, Bob’s journey to musical talents showcases the potential within individuals with special needs.

The Early Years

Bob was born in China after a complicated delivery. “He was in a heads-up position, which led to a selective C-section,” Lucy Gao, Bob’s mother, explained. “There were no other complications, though, and the delivery went smoothly.”

From birth, it was clear that Bob had a larger-than-average head, which doctors had noted even before his birth. He was always a tall child, now standing at 6’7”. While his size was not a concern early on, his developmental milestones were slower than those of other children.

It was not until Bob was around one year old that Lucy began to notice something different. “He never made eye contact, which is something that babies typically develop early on,” she recalled. “He didn’t look for attention the way other children did. He would wake up and be very calm, but not seek interaction.”

By the time Bob turned three, his language development was still significantly delayed, and Lucy and her husband decided to seek professional help. Bob was diagnosed with a pervasive developmental delay, which later was classified as autism spectrum disorder. This diagnosis, though difficult to hear, began the process of finding the right support for Bob.

A Journey of Understanding

At first, Lucy struggled with the diagnosis. “There was a sense of denial in the beginning,” she admitted. “We tried to find out why this happened and what could be done, but after a lot of tests and evaluations, there was no clear reason, it just seemed to be who Bob was.”

Bob’s parents sought help from neurologists, genetic specialists, and therapists, and started speech therapy and an infant parent training program at Baylor College of Medicine. Despite these efforts, Bob faced many challenges, including trouble feeding himself and basic developmental delays. However, there was one thing that made a difference: music.

A Lifeline to Communication

From a very young age, Bob was drawn to music. “He was sensitive to certain sounds and stimuli, and music had a calming effect on him,” Lucy recalled. Bob would cry more than average babies, but when music played, he seemed to relax.” We started with nursery rhyme songs and then bought him a toy xylophone. Bob loved it and would figure out the notes to the songs on his own. It was amazing.”

As Bob grew, so did his musical interests. His first piano was a toy keyboard, but it wasn’t long before he began to engage with real instruments. However, traditional piano lessons proved difficult. “We tried several piano teachers, but due to his limited language skills, they couldn’t teach him in a conventional way,” Lucy said.

It wasn’t until Lucy attended an Autism Society event that Bob’s musical path took a turn. There, she met a woman who worked at the UCLA School of Music, and the advice she offered would change everything. “She said, ‘Let him enjoy music first. Don’t focus on the structure, just let him play and have fun with it,'” Lucy remembered. Inspired by this advice, Lucy decided to stop forcing Bob into formal lessons and let him explore music freely.

A Creative Approach to Teaching

Lucy’s approach to teaching Bob music evolved. She color-coded the piano keys to represent different notes, allowing Bob to play without the need to read traditional sheet music. “It was through this method that he began playing more complex pieces,” Lucy shared. “He could play Mozart, Beethoven, and other classical pieces purely by ear, without needing to read the notes.”

Bob’s ability to play pieces by ear left many people in awe and wonder. “He may not communicate in traditional ways, but when you hear him play, you realize that his talent speaks louder than words ever could,” Lucy said proudly.

Overcoming Challenges

While Bob’s musical skills blossomed, communication and social interactions remained difficult. “Bob has always had trouble with language,” Lucy noted. “He still struggles with understanding social cues and communication. Even now, when he answers questions, he often tries to please others rather than express his own feelings.”

Despite these challenges, Bob’s musical abilities have given him confidence and a sense of accomplishment. “It’s not easy to teach him. There are moments of frustration, but we’ve learned to be patient and observe his needs,” Lucy explained. “He notices the little things around him. It’s as if music helped him tune into the world in a way nothing else could.”

Raising Awareness 

Lucy is passionate about raising awareness of autism and advocating for a broader understanding of people with special needs. “It’s important to shift the focus from the disability to the ability,” she said. “People often see Bob and assume he’s incapable of much, but when they hear him play, they are astonished. That’s the power of showing ability, not disability.”

Bob’s participation in the FCSN talent show has been one way for him to share his musical gifts with a wider audience. “Many people would never know the depth of his talent if they didn’t hear him perform,” Lucy shared. “He is breaking barriers and showing the world what people with autism can do when given the opportunity.”

As Bob continues to showcase his musical talents, his story serves as a reminder that with the right support and encouragement, individuals with autism can thrive in ways we may never expect. It is not about what they cannot do, it is about celebrating what they can.